January 2021 – Raw Nature Spirit

I was born with it

Since I was a child I was aware of this ‘feeling’ (emotional vibration is of the most value to me) that spoke to me of what was about to happen. I felt the feelings and watched events unfold. Like an invisible friend it followed me. Another way to describe it was like wearing a piece of familiar and comfortable clothing, always against my skin. Sometimes I struggled to understand its messages even though I instinctively knew it did not matter. It was not tested on anything. Regardless I was always aware of it being there and its name was Intuition.

Later through the traumas of the world and life my friend became subdued and I with it. It remained quiet for longer and I felt lonelier than ever. Loneliness happened to me very early on (around the age of five, which I still remember) due to being seen as different, hard to reach, difficult to read, emotional and sensitive and later on referred to as too deep, too serious or too dark.

Loneliness followed me into adulthood. By that point my Intuition was gagged, tied up and hidden in the darkest place of my psyche by demands of life and the adult world that my heart felt was wrong, but could not change. I became too much, too feeling and my body followed into a black hole of mysterious physical ailments. I lost my inner voice. Only music revived me temporarily. When I touched the piano keys and lost myself in music I found something else; a place where everything was just being and flowing. I was not allowed none of that outside of music, outside of myself.

Many years had passed and I began to feel a rising of something familiar within me. In truth it slammed into my life like a hurricane; like the loudest noise that had been dying to expel its roar for many years. There was fury and confusion initially, but peace followed, a deep knowing kind. I was being put together again, the same way when I was a child when I first became aware of my friend. This time it was bigger, stronger and with my friend returning to me, wiser.

This time I understood its messages clearly and I vowed to hold it precious and not let go. Intuition became a way of life for me. It was mine and only mine, on my terms, for my own good and restoration of myself, others and the planet. I began to follow it without a doubt, hesitation or fear. Intuition was one thing I trusted. I let the magic back in, my own kind, intuitive one. And along with Nature as my God and inspiration everything changed. I was no longer watching things unfold, but began participating in life in a way of discernment of what’s good and not and so including myself in everything for the first time. I was no longer standing witness to the needs and wants of others; attending from the side lines to everyone’s feelings and recovery. I began to live my life fully and unconditionally and what allowed me to do that was my inner companion, my now fully visible or rather felt friend under the name of Intuition. One true gift of yourself to yourself.

We all possess internal gifts, treasures that are vital to our thriving and protection. Like our body who the intuition is in partnership with, it is always on our side and if we hear the voice, understand its language and learn to follow its advice life becomes a different way of engagement. It is a way to finding joy, strengthening boundaries, avoiding pointless mistakes and honouring our feelings at ALL times. Feelings are another ally of Intuition.

My book Pagan Portals Intuitive Magic Practice explores the subject of intuition and how with its integration and help one can create a magical practice unique to you. It is about reclaiming and restoration of your inner voice. The message aims to be inspiring, empowering and the book provide real-life examples and practical steps towards using intuition as you craft your spells and include magic in your life. If you remain curious and enchanted, it can be a life-changing first step.

The book offers self-affirming concepts and principles that will connect you back to yourself.

If you ever wondered about that inner knowing that dwells within you; a powerful navigation system you know you were born with, but forgot how to use it or ignored its value due to life’s conditioning, now IS the time to rediscover that value again and go back to being guided by your own inner wisdom.

The book explained and a real-life example

The book comes out in April 2021 and is currently open for pre-orders on the publishers website

PRE-ORDER here

This book is aimed at people, who are becoming curious and start researching the Earth-based spiritual path. Perhaps you read a couple of books, articles or seen some films that drew you into the world of witchcraft, Druidry or, may be a Shaman figures spoke to you from a place unknown. You might have had an experience that sparked your curiosity and you would like to seek further what your path might be.

The book is in the series of Pagan Portals, which are aimed at beginners, but also can be helpful and insightful for experienced practitioners. These books include unique and personal experiences of practitioners from many nature-based spiritual paths, which make them unique in a way of finding information you might not find otherwise. They can also be looked at as Introductory guides into a particular subject.

Pagan Portals Intuitive Magic Practice touches on an important subject of intuition, which many pagan practitioners would agree is one of the ingredients that are worth including in your spiritual magical practice. The subject does require some research, self-insight and practice. If you take the book as some beginners’ steps into this practice you can develop it further overtime, which has a true potential to change your life.

I had some feedback recently on the book from a woman, a mother, a person, who has begun a journey of searching for something more. Earth-based spiritual path began unfolding for her subtly, with gentle feelings here and there and the land began to call to her inviting into joining in with a place, nature, wilderness out there and within. She never engaged in spells and witchcraft yet curious about what a life of a magician might be like she began researching. Her other reason was to break away from a strict authoritarian religious views of her close circle growing up. She felt stifled by the religion unable to explore for herself until now. I recommended she looks through Pagan Portal series books to see if anything jumped out at her and begin reading. The books are short and concise with clear messages and good writing. They are engaging and reader-friendly with practices that can easily be incorporated into anyone’s life.

She gave me an example of her engagement with mu book. At first she said she was not receiving it. I thought her way of putting that was interesting and very relevant to the subject of intuition. Receiving it… or not. At the time her experience was that she went through an event when after she followed an external advice she felt sharply ‘in her gut’ that it wasn’t right for her.

In her own words:

And thus I ignored my own intuitive wisdom.

The gut feeling is not a coincidence, as a lot of our heart-felt and emotional experiences are stored in the gut and it is closely linked with our hearts and brains. It is a rich, futile soil for where signals are often clear, sharp and difficult to ignore. She ignored the message coming from her body – the body is another ally of Intuition, as well as, emotions, the heart. At the same time she struggled to ‘receive’ the messages in the book – how curious. Only when she decided to undo the action she knew was not the right one for her and for her body and attempted to engage with the book again she heard it and was able to engage. You see there are defences within us against Intuition, as we had been programmed to ignore ‘such nonsense’ and use common sense and logic. There is nothing wrong with logic yet without intuition we are not able to discern the best way for us. Logic follows, heart/gut discern and is always in alliance with the body and on your side. Mind is not always in alliance with the body, as we all know.

She reported that a gentle, non-forceful writing helped her continue, as I guided her through my personal examples, which she found useful when applying theory to practice.

In her own words:

So now I started reading again. And it sinks in and makes sense!
Your style of writing suits me. It feels ‘neutral’. Not judging or telling what to do (as is my experience from growing up in a Protestant community). The way you ‘mix’ theory with your experiences, makes it understandable and recognizable.

I encourage you to give yourself a chance to remain curious with and enchanted by the nature-based spiritual and magic path. The earth-based faith is a place where you have a chance to find yourself. It can open up doors and possibilities for transformation and clarity like never before. Here I am going to say it and invite you to ‘Follow your intuition’ towards what calls you. Trust yourself to know the answers to the questions you have been asking for a long time. We all have to start somewhere and I hope my book will open up one such door for you.

The book is also specifically relevant to the work of a witch and magical practice based on intuition. If you are aware that the witch in you wants to speak and awaken and you are empathic and intuitive by birth and have always known it, this book will offer you an alternative way of building a practice, the way you want it to feel and work. It puts you at the centre of your practice.

Thank you for your support and following.

Much love and many blessings!

2020’s priceless gift to me

This past year has brought the biggest insight of my whole life and from their it felt like my life finally began. It has been a missing piece for so long and I will be forever grateful for the freedom that insight brought me.
I finally became aware that My biggest need is not to meet the needs of others. That is the truest, most profound realisation that myself had to hear. Everything that hasn’t worked hinged on me being unaware and not seeing this one truth for me.
This understanding of my greatest need and the cause of so much pain and sorrow in my life brought an end to my work as a therapist. The relief was like no other I had ever experienced, which was a confirmation of claiming my personal freedom back. Manifestations that followed only amplified the important of the piece of my unconscious self needing to die and I let it go gladly and openly with compassion and care for myself and gratitude for all the hours I spent helping others all my life.

They say a wounded healer is the best healer and that is true and unsurprising. As those of us, who feel deeply into everything, dwelling in our pain and of others, especially others, comes naturally, as natural as not knowing any other way of being, as natural as breathing. But is it good for us? No. Our freedom literally is always out of reach for as long as we put others ahead of ourselves always with no conditions and with an open willingness to sacrifice, to be there no matter what. In doing so we condemn ourselves to more pain, to more suffering and never ending cycles of going backwards looking for more pain, the more the better. It crates an environment and a hunger to seek the depths of despair and almost revel in it. They call it pain addiction.

I knew there was something else, something different that screamed to be born and that was allowing for things to end and let myself live. I literary had to save myself and to do that this anomaly, this other way had to come in. The death of it came naturally in 2020 in many ways with closure of many avenues due to pandemic, due to getting ill and not functioning it was a soothing voice of the universe telling me it was time. In death I was reborn and the wings that I long lost grew back again.

They say with each ending there’s a beginning and that has been true for me over and over. We have to be brave enough to include our own needs into equation and meet them. It takes a lifetime often, but it is what’s meant to happen at the end when we start the journey of paving the road back to self, back to life of not suffering and pain, but choosing joy, peace and a simple yet the most profound pleasure of being alive.

It’s been a year of insights and transformations for so many and it gives me such hope. May this evolution continue with each coming year and with more momentum and intensity till we can all say that we vow to live our best lives and create haven on earth whatever it might mean for each of us.

more Soul Land reviews

Educator
Soul Land by Natalia Clarke engages the reader through lovely language and imagery. I’m looking forward to showing several of these lines to my students as mentor texts to inspire their own writing!

Claire M.
So beautiful. It really takes a special poetry book to maintain my interest and this one did. Gentle yet powerful. Highly recommended for poetry fans, and those who are open to new things.

Katie M.
This was such a lovely poetry collection. It was different from others I’ve read before. It showed a deep and personal connection to Scotland, the heritage, and the culture. I normally read poetry to relate to what is being said. This was rather hard for me to connect to since I have no connection at all to Scotland. Regardless, it was very beautiful. I loved what I read and wish it was longer.

Wulfie N.
This collection was incredibly unique. It painted a beautiful picture with its words, and I fell in love with every single one of them.

DeAnn H.
This poetry collection really was a love letter to Scotland and how the author feels about Scotland. There was some beautiful imagery and wonderful phrases that painted a picture of the wildness and beauty of Scotland. I did really enjoy the poems and language, but wished it was a little longer. I would have loved to read more since I did feel it was a bit short. Still, a lot of the images inspired by her words were wonderful and definitely make you feel like you can see the landscape she’s describing.

PUBLICATIONS

Nature is all there is…

Nature is the original intelligence, life-force, evolution and transformative realm that just is. I like working with nature as the most primary source of all intelligence grounded in the body, clarity of thinking and depth of feeling. Most of all it doesn’t seek to enslave, manipulate or control. It is of free will and choice and in not wanting anything from you essentially encourages sovereignty and that is priceless. It demonstrates and shows how things can unfold naturally when one is allowed to be and grow in a way one chooses. I admire all things nature for that.

Another aspect is simplicity and inclusive sense of all belonging together and working together. It doesn’t try to be something it is not and has no concern for whether you are for it or against. To me it is the most perfect example of how to live. It is all consciousness and it doesn’t have labels. It has clear, purposeful, intentional cycles of life and death. In its inclusiveness it is perfection.

As an elemental and intuitive witch and all around nature-based spiritual practitioner, I have learnt from nature starting from the ground up with studying the nature elements and the qualities of each, which like a mirror reflected back to me what my qualities are; those that are weaker and those that are distorted and where I am most balanced. It taught me that listening to your own elemental self will never lead us astray. It just wouldn’t make sense for that not to be true.

Another thing that I can’t live without and is like breathing to me is beauty and where else one can experience things more beautiful than in nature. My belief has been for a long time that beauty will save the world. In nature it is not all butterflies and flowers, however, it is about survival and predation, violence and death yet even in those manifestations there’s immense beauty. One only has to experience a storm and the devastation it can cause or get in contact with the poisonous and dangerous species yet so stunning. I don’t believe it is always a disguise I believe it is meant to be beautiful in all forms. We only have to see it for what it is and not for what it is not depending on what our mind would tell us is good for us or our needs. Beauty is everywhere and it only takes one moment of immersion into something beautiful, however minute, allows a possibility of being pulled back into our own beauty, because we are one with that in our combined elemental nature. Nature brings enchantment back into our hearts and that enchantment can bring such changes to how we live.

Many treat nature as God and it is easy to see why and it is not wrong, but what I most appreciate is that it doesn’t see itself as either above or below. It just is, being, flowing and morphing from one manifestation to another without any concern for an external human or any other influence. It doesn’t have that need or awareness of that being necessary. It is sovereign and it encourages us all to be. It calls for us to get in touch with our souls and return to self, to the original.

To understand what I mean one only has to connect to something nature-based, anything of what you consider nature and in time a sight develops, things become clear, parallels are drawn and lessons learnt. There’s no greater teacher than our natural world and it will remain my religion, solace, happiness and peace.