Free yourself

Feeling insignificant is the best feeling in the world. It is on a par with freedom and there’s nothing more important to me in life than that. Experiencing the higher state of being insignificant is the ultimate state of being hidden, silenced, cloaked in, covered up and small, invisible, minute in the grand theatre of life. It is not the same as having no value. It is the opposite, a realisation that, in fact, you are part of everything, and everything is part of you.

 
I find this feeling in nature. In places open and expansive, where there’s no end to the edge of the earth and sea, and the skies are limitless, infinite, boundless all around.
In such places one is closer to the divine within and without than anywhere else. The sacred solitude that one can participate in such places has a feeling of being completely naked, raw, and exposed, and it feels like the most natural way of being. Primal voice of the land is like the strike of divinity straight into your heart. 


Feeling like a tiny speck in the mass of creation and all that it holds is a state that instantly calms, grounds, and clarifies the meaning of it all. 


Have you ever been on an island where the quietude is so tangible it tastes sweet on your tongue? Th silence is deafening and immensely restorative. It feels like the elixir of all life combined, and you feel a part of it. Belonging to something bigger than yourself is a truly spiritual feeling that in mixed in all senses in just the right unity. Perfection. 


Insignificance is freedom. It is simplicity and joy in knowing exactly who you are and where you fit. It is that place in the heart where everything exists, a place that calms and comforts you into being you, however you definite value for yourself as long as it makes you feel alive. It is not being something or someone. It is not about becoming someone or making something of yourself, it is being you and the perspective of being insignificant releases you and affirms your value like nothing else. 

I find one true perspective in this wherever things feel difficult, uncertain, stagnant, or pointless. I turn within to that place where I exist and remind myself, as I often do with others, that we are worthy of life and creation simply because we are here. We are in life and participating even if it doesn’t feel that way sometimes. We are here and we are enough.

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Women and Intuition

BOOK REVIEW

The Crone and I at Samhain

I heard her say ‘Get on a horse’ and without hesitation I got into my car and drove to the woods that called me. She was all around and Samhain felt near. I felt calm and ready to commune with her.


The woods kept changing atmosphere from grey and wet to light and shimmering. Autumnal light streamed through the golden tops of blackened tree bodies. I felt a sense of intention and joy within. She was near and I was reassured. I realised her confidence-building purpose and quality as I developed my own inner hearing. She is and always has been on the side of the feminine and healing of the wounded maiden was just one intention she carried. Today I truly felt that having been through the maiden and mother stages.


Cronehood is a stage I truly look forward to and even more so with her by my side. I am excited and curious about things to come. Today she was full of lessons and the more I engaged with her the more I felt I could truly understand the symbology and meaning behind her one-sentenced phrases. She doesn’t say much and very intentional with what she discloses.
She spoke of the importance of our bodies, physicality and how our disconnection from the animal-selves caused discord and imbalance in many areas as a result. She spoke of nature and landscape as essential parts to any life as they hold the animal-self within offering us to connect back to the earth, the self and spirit of things. Only through deeply feeling into the physical and matter-like within us we can encounter the spirit. It is all interconnected.


She spoke of how we disempower ourselves via covering up by dying our hair, messing about with nails and shaving off what’s intended to be there. And not only that we create a world of shame, unacceptable, conforming and pleasing to the external as a result. We cut off from the natural self by avoiding our own beauty, the natural kind. Our crown becomes dimmed with chemicals and that magic that can be felt in the fingers is dimmed. I can relate to the fingers holding the paper well and am guilty of not looking after myself in that area. I connected instantly to the message of disempowering myself by not being kind and nurturing to myself. It saddened me.


With the crone hood stage we are invited to delve into another stage of coming back to ourselves. I feel excited by it.


Last year she spoke her word to me, which I turned into a book. It comes out in December and I look forward to sharing the message with more women around the world.


Pre-order HERE


Latest review:

“You have given the world a delightful and deep examination of Baba Yaga from your insightful and learned perspective. Thank you.

 In a world where uncertainty and fear are the currency of the day, we can become enchanted by a sort of artificial lightness that ultimately only makes us more anxious. We become terrified of the dark. Yet it is in the dimness of our own souls that we find refuge from the harshness of life.

If we are able to peer into this darkness we may see a peculiar little house governed by a curious figure. Baba Yaga, crone of legend, greets us with a glint in her eye, and a question on her lips. “Who are you?” she inquires with a cackle. Natalia Clarke answers this question, while exploring the stories and characteristics of Baba Yaga through traditional lore and personal insights. Merging together her Slavic origins, training in depth psychology, and natural spiritual practices, she is our companion as we venture into the mysteries of this face of the crone. Beautifully written with journal entries, dream explorations, and ways to connect with Baba Yaga, I highly recommend this delightful book for anyone who wants to go deeper into her mysteries.”

By Cyndi Brannen, the author of Keeping Her Keys

Breakdown

A wild something screams out of the flesh, released for all to see
The fear, horror, hopelessness 
With only one desire – not to exist


The uncontrollable despair comparable only to deep dark sorrow
Once you experience sorrow, someone said, the depth is done, for it is sorrow that defines the darkest of darkness
How does one continue after such exposure, sorrow repeated over and over?


But it continues… how, I don’t know
What saves one?
Logic, sense, love, meaning of some sort; all the things that can not be grasped at in moments of being stripped of all flesh 


But it subsides, comes back into itself beaten, broken and bare yet somewhat whole
Pierced with holes and stained with blood of a battle just passed
But living, catching breath, continuing 


I heard a whisper between sobs and spiky mess of the ravaged mind
‘Keep looking out’
For I was surrounded by mountains on one side and by a forest of the other
Keep looking, seeing, let it be in elemental presence
Oh how I tried to see with no vision and feel through the cracks of broken flesh. I tried yet failed


Another day came and the whisper persisted
‘Keep trying,’ it said and like a mother the vast landscape filled with light opened its arms 
To which it drew me in embrace 
And I was home again
The fog lifted off my senses as mist released the water off its hold
Revealing space, an openness, hope, a chance to take flight again, to take another breath 

What nature does

Summer meadow

It keeps me in balance in the body, mind and spirit. When seasons are aligned externally I am aligned internally. When it is off, I am off. It is a point of reference for me physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It is a way of knowing myself as part of a bigger picture. The way it makes us feel insignificant is beneficial for us to bring us back into a place of humble being. Landscapes surrounding us and there are multiple landscapes, each of which, can offer a perspective. I like to think in terms of the four elements. Water, earth, fire and air. Each landscape has all of it entwined with one or more dominating, just like us, humans do and through immersion into the elements we get to restore back into balance.


Nature is an incredible life-partner, one I can not live without, as without it there will not be me. The deep knowing of it being within and without brings a profound sense of ‘this is it’. It comforts and reassures like nothing else.


It helps my mind be simply a function in aid to all my other functions, no more and no less. There’s always just enough thinking and clear enough to begin and end where it should. There’s no ruminating, overthinking and becoming overwhelmed by my thoughts to a point everything else shuts down. For me this is specifically related to hiking in nature landscapes, physically moving through places of natural environments and again there is a place for each desired effect I might be seeking.


Nature is a source of inspiration, awe, enchantment and wonder and it is the greatest feeder of my soul. Spirit is in the land and it is felt no matter where I am. It speaks a language that is so specific to nuances of the heart that it can take your breath away and it often does. One might say an understanding can be had from nature towards us. It has no judgement or punishment or even interest in particular in us. It just is and that is perfection, something for us takes a life-time to comprehend, if at all.


Nature is the greatest gift to humanity yet we abuse it daily. That’s what humans do through ignorance and arrogance. It does continue and regenerate though, it carries on regardless and if only we had reverence for that kind of resilience and beingness the world would be a different place. Think heaven on earth, well it is all there, in nature, in the land itself. It’s always been heavenly and always will be. Why we don’t want to be part of that I will never know…


Nature is sacred. There is mystery, magic, truth and life all locked within it. That is all there is to it. It is the most important creation on earth and always will be long after we are all gone. Ending up without our nature landscapes would erase all meaning for me. I can not comprehend existing without it and every day looking out of the window to a birch tree outside I feel blessed to have witnessed nature for real, in my life time. I fear it won’t be here forever…