Get excited about what’s going to happen without needing to know what it is.
Be kind in all areas; communication, deeds, connections.
Get outside every day.
Loss the psychical heaviness and release more energy and agility in whatever way you find is best for you.
Lift weights.
Enjoy good food.
Continue nurturing someone or something (this one is priceless).
Don’t be afraid to grab life.
Do things rather than think about them.
Do not overcomplicate – that is just excuses, fear and resistance.
Do not preach.
We have little influence over the greater plan individually or collectively. We have some agency, but that’s different from influence, which we do not have a lot of.
The draw to the hut was strong. My body ached with the need and desire to go there.
‘I will come and stay for a month,’ I turned to him and said running my hand across a wooden log, the cabin was made from. I was there, but I was not, not fully, not like I needed or wanted to.
‘I will stay with you. We can go fishing and berry picking.’ He wiped mosquito off his cheek. The stickiness of the summer evening on my skin felt strange and it smelt strongly of jasmine. That place was ripe with everything nature, just like in my childhood. I wanted to drink it in.
In the cabin there were people. They looked happy going about their business. I remember being overcome by jealousy for their fortune of being able to stay there. It was like I was there, but I was not. From my dream I observed it all. I was just a visitor in that place, but in my blood, I knew it as my home from long ago. The ache of wanting to live there rose again.
There were several rooms: a hall, a big lounge, and an attic. Each room had its purpose. A child joined me and began following me everywhere. It was a small boy but had a girl’s name and looks very pretty. I sat on a sofa and a young woman came and covered me with a blanket. A young man, who showed me around appeared to be in charge. The place felt pure, kind, yet it held secrets, codes, treasures to be discovered. I became very curious.
‘Where can I find her,’ I asked him.
He turned away fiddling with a piece of wood in his hand.
‘I should not really tell you. May be just leave it. It has been a long time and you do not know what it will lead to.’ He looked at me with understanding and warmth.
‘I do know what you are saying. I do. I just wondered if she was around.’
And then he said, ‘She is around, all around. She is right next door.’
‘Left, or right?’ I asked.
He looked right but meant left. Somehow, I understood that.
Once outside everything was lush green with rowans lining up the road on both sides. Late summer. Berries were beginning to redden. I took it all in. It smelt like rich soil and home. I was home. And then darkness. I plunged into it suddenly and it felt comforting. The thing about darkness, you might not be able to see anyone, but no one can see you either. I always found that comforting to know. I took my shoes off and walked out of the gate and looked where her house was. It was large and beautiful. Luxurious with big windows. I felt scared. Night summer air intoxicatingly alluring. I took another deep breath.
‘I could not possible go in that house,’ I thought. So imposing and grand, not what I expected, and it was right there, next to the house I stayed in.
Next, I walked back through the gate and stood on a bench lined up against the gate to peek into the windows next door. I knew I should not be doing it but could not help it. Curiosity took over. And then I saw cats, lots of back cats. They were the size of dogs. They roamed the boarder scowling. They began moving towards me as soon as they spotted me. I froze in terror. They snarled at me, and one sank her teeth into my leg. I felt sharp pain. They withdrew.
I ran into the house, but someone followed me in. I turned around and there she was. Young and beautiful, simply dressed. Her hair colour I recognised, as my own, when I was a child. Decorative small earrings, nothing out of the ordinary apart from her face. Intensely kind, shining from within she was. I felt her goodness, but also darkness all at the same time. She was both life and death. She took my hand in hers, which felt clammy and cool, but not unpleasant. I froze, fascinated, honoured, and humbled all at the same time. Then she told me her name… It was her, before she was her.
It was one of those significant dreams, which I have not had for some time. I am grateful to receive one last night. Dreams are products of our psyche. They are from us, about us and for us. Over my lifetime I learnt to recognise various categories of dreams. This one belongs to a ‘telling’ dream that contained several messages for me and reflected aspects of my own consciousness that should help me moving forward. It was fairy tale like with vivid landscapes, vibrant colours, and strong smells. I touched objects and people with intent and purpose that remains with me now on waking. I love sensory dreams like this one and it just had to be recorded. She was there, the young version of her, before she became her…
When engaging with the intuitive function there are ways that it might come in. I am often asked about how to learn to listen to it or how do we know that intuition is being activated. It is neither learning nor knowing it just is. It is like not knowing what colour your own eyes are. It is that innate. It is simpler than what we perceive as something to learn or know about. It is always there and the main way is through feeling.
Feeling is difficult for many through various life impacts, conditions we grew up in and messages we received regarding feelings and emotional expression in general. Doing vs being is a debate that is endless in this world and often stems from the habitual patterns of behaviour the majority developed over their life time. It is so strong, in fact, many can not name a feeling they are experiencing. So ‘what to do about intuition’ then becomes an automatic block.
For most of us, however, it is a natural thing. It just got put aside and literary forgotten as another way of navigating life. The journey of rediscovering it is exciting and I dare say when it ignites you will know. One has to be open to doing thing differently, and as many would testify this happens when old ways no longer work. When thinking is a good thing it only offers half of what we are capable of. Without adding feeling into our experience it is like functioning with a head alone, but being disconnected from the body entirely.
Having gone through the process for many years of rediscovering or rather going back to my natural way of being, which is via feeling, it feels like coming home finally. Since I was very small, for as long as I remember, I almost, one might say, fought for the right to be able to feel fully and the whole range. I was never allowed and I rebelled and rebelled until eventually in order to survive I had no choice but give it up. I am not alone in that sadly. Since then I vowed to myself that one day I will feel again whatever I want whenever I want and become me again, as feeling and intuitive way of being (linked) are the most natural me I had ever known.
To conclude I will give one example of how lately I discovered an even more nuanced way my intuition speaks. It is either a YES, a NO or a MAYBE.
When it is a YES it is very clear and I never question it. Feelings that accompany that knowing are peacefulness, certainty, calmness in my body and satisfaction. When it is a NO it is also clear, but feelings that come with it are ‘phew, thank God’, I.e. a relief, a lucky escape type of scenario, gratitude, humble awareness of things bigger than myself that guide me, joy, release and calm.
The MAY BE took me a few tries to understand and when it is a May be, it is more a NO than a YES, always. I have gone down the path of a yes when it was always a no at the end, so you might say I have tested it and sometimes paid the price. So when it is ‘not sure’, it is a NO for me.
I hope you find this interesting as I certainly do. These are fine-tuned relational threads with my own intuition but before then it is a long road back to YOU and most importantly to your feeling self.
I talk about how the journey might unfold and offer ways of connecting in my BOOK, which proved to have reawakened more in readers than just a magical practice based on what you want and how you feel in any given moment. Check it out for yourself and hope you extract something that sparks you in wanting to engage with a natural state that is our intuition.
Raw Nature Spirit 
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