Summer Solstice 2017

Summer Solstice sizzled away like a hot fire pit and this morning we have fresh air and breeze. It is as if the earth is about to take a deep breath out and join in a dance with the brewing storm. I am up early this morning as I feel the storm coming and I become alive again after a very hot week and the hottest day of the year – Summer Solstice 2017.

I was faced with so many challenges during the week, confronted with the burning Sun, which seemly held no mercy for my discomfort and I moaned and moaned till I could bear it no longer. When Summer Solstice came and the heat reached its highest peak here in the UK my voice was gone and my spirit dimmed to a faint whisper of acknowledgment of my troubles. In that ‘melting’ I began to recognise my powerlessness against what appeared full of people to be a big lesson in love, patience and gratitude. I ended up taking a journey to the city, on a hot train and to my surprise I remained calm and collected with no grinding within my mind or heart. I stepped into a space of surrendering. I recognised it and that inner silence felt soothing. I remained in observation of things around me and within me and communicating gently with nature in its hottest burning state. I felt it smiling inviting all growth into dancing and fires burning all over the globe in honouring the Sun smelt delicious. The song of the Bard enchanted me into trance-like state of love, peace and gratitude.

I felt my relationship with the masculine challenged in the physical and spiritual sense and I knew it needed to be repairs, as ‘heat’, distorted fire within me raptured it. I began consciously cooling down in terms of being ok with what is and being accepting of releasing with the sweat what needed to go. I understood that my voice had a major place in how my discomfort is perceived and its effect of others. I pulled back, withdrawn to reflect on the sound of my voice and the meaning of the words spoken. It is within the balance of expressing your inner most uncomfortable cries within your soul and body and respecting the space where others co-exist. It is always about the balance and both are equally important if we are to be authentic. It is as much you as it is others, no more and no less. As we look within more the outside transforms and as the outsides engages with us we discover things within. Through the ‘voice’ work I offered a hand of reparation to the masculine and embraced its firy nourishment. There is still mistrust, yes, caution and suspicion and subsequent wish to withdraw. I am very aware of that, but what I choose is not only engage with that restraint within me in response to the masculine heat, I am also willing to expose my face to the brightest, hottest heat that seeks my attention.

I feel alive today post-Solstice and very inspired to continue this journey with deep gratitude and love in my heart and seeking engagement more and more with myself and others. Summer teaches connection, relationship to yourself and others. It is a time to be sociable, to acknowledge those links we have with others and recognise our contribution to that collective dance. It is the NOW time, summer, when we look at our achievements and life as a whole ‘warts and all’ and come out proud into a play field of our life with full engagement and appreciation.

 

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New year new altar

Today I am clearing spaces, putting things away and changing things round in every room. I love this ritual of renewal and when better than in January.

I have been waiting for this energy with anticipation and excitement after a densely packed and quite unpleasant and suffocating month of December. I have become aware there is a pattern of a certain vibration that shows up every year towards the end of the year. More to learn, unpack and transform. Great learning.

My lovely Yule altar, which I wanted to be simple and effective this year with colours of red and white, served well during dark times. I love Yule. Now it’s time for a change. I am ready. Everything that’s been is now gone and it feels good. There’s only today and a possibility of tomorrow.

January is an active, inspirational and creative time for me usually. I enjoy it usually and throw myself into work, projects being very focused, motivated and organised. This, I feel, is present again this year, but along with the ‘doing’ I am also including the ‘being’ vibration. Peaceful and soothing, soft and gentle, restful and meditative. Therefore for this time in-between now and Imbolc on the 2nd February my altar goes to my sort of ‘default’ presentation of peace and tranquility, Buddha like space which I love so very much. Colours are purple and white and the feeling is love, light and peace. 

My intention is to go out there and grab life and do lots of exciting things, create beautiful musings and engage in writing and learning as much as I can, but also give myself space and time to be still, present, focused within and at peace with myself and the world.
Blessings!

The season of transitions

Autumn is the time when summer lingers still not wanting to let go, but carrying a deep knowing that it must surrender its hot days and green armor at the same time. As winter often fearful of leaving, like an ice princess it perseveres with its bitter bite and powerful winds, like spring that brings rain to a land in an attempt to overflow arrival of heat and steady sunshine, summer is too is holding on with its green leaves and surprisingly hot sunny days.

I go through transitions during Autumn when it is the time to take stock of the harvest and think about what to keep and what to let go off, what will serve us well and what is no longer needed. It is the waning part of the year with clearing space for the next stage, next season of our journey.

I walked to the woods this morning to witness the process of transition mirrored back to me. There is sadness, fear present and also surrender at the same time. Just like death it can feel final, lonely and utterly terrifying. I came across a dying hare lying on the path. I leaned down witnessing its struggle to stand up and run into the field, it couldn’t. I felt hopeless and helpless. Distress was so hard to watch and I felt its fear deep within me. I picked it up and moved it to the hedge on the side of the main path and sat with it stroking its long ears. It felt calmer, more surrendered and comfortable. I spoke gently to it. I then walked on leaving the hare to transition in its own time, giving it some privacy. The balance of involvement and allowing is so important.

In nature everything is always just as it should be. Trees stand in their patient postures rooted in the knowledge of things always changing and transitioning, yet there is also a degree of resistance, anticipation, and uncertainty of what’s to come. Nature walks through the cycles with confidence, as it is in the very core of life with all relationships, beginnings and endings, flourishing times and periods of famine and scarcity. Nature knows, yet trees are hesitant to drop its green lush foliage and insects are all around taking in the last warm air. The sun is shining, but it no longer burns, it knows it must die, but only to return again. There is such peace in nature’s presence, deep knowing and surrender and with every transition it teaches us to just be with what is, allow for things to flow, change and when time comes die.

I walked back. The hare lay dead on the path where I moved it from. It looked serene, peaceful and perfectly still. It left this world, the struggle was over and it looked beautiful with its beady black eyes staring into another space. I am filled with sadness, but also a relief that one journey ended and another will begin shortly and so it goes again and again with each turn of the nature’s wheel.

Blessed Mabon!

 

June – my yearly spiritual journey begins

June – the month of spiritual opening

I have been consciously observing my relationship with each season and Sabbatt over the last two years, as part of me growing deeper into my spirituality. Following each month with awareness of energies, shifts, difficulties, preferences  I have come to many extremely useful insights and revelations, which subsequently had an impact on my life in all areas. One of the main insights was that there are certain patterns I go through as the Wheel turns through the year.

Some of you might already know, e.g. the month of May and the festival of Beltain is a difficult time for me due to some trauma that had occurred in my past. May is closely linked to the realm of ‘relationships’ for me. This year was no different; however, as I noticed recurring themes coming in each year I also set my intention to make a conscious shift in NOT repeating certain things going forward. I received upgrades and demands of necessary clearing out of my consciousness and invitation to grow into a new way of being in relation to repeated themes. Very much like a recurring dream until a dreamer gets the message, so to speak, patterns will continue to occur with messages becoming louder and louder. Will see what happens next year in relation to that, as I make what had been unconscious conscious and heal through my material. Very excited, needless to say, to be doing this work and being on this path. It is endlessly inspiring to me to be living the life in alignment with natural cycles and nature’s wisdom.

We are now in June, post-Summer Solstice, and what I have come to realise there is another pattern, which occurs for me during this month, specifically around and post Summer Solstice. This Sabbatt is another period of transition when the Kings are changed and we are beginning our descend towards shorter days and longer nights. This year, by the way, insights have been coming in so profoundly quick, like hitting me over the head with information and ways to move forward. Terribly exciting. This one was no different. The way I came to realise something was going on was the way I was asked to ‘go to sleep’, as if to say ‘there are messages in your dreams you need to know NOW’. A couple of times and, this happened during the day, I was ‘knocked down’ literally and the only way was to my bed to sleep immediately. I found it impossible to stay awake or do anything and, of course, those dreams are proving to be extremely potent with information. During the night dreaming has also become noticably intense. A lot of death occurs for me in dreams at this time, but this is another post all together. Looking back I began to reflect and make links with the month of June and how often at this time a dream journey for the year, the biggest one, would usually begin for me. This is a series of dreams, which hold a story for my growth and development, a story I must write down and follow and go through until it is complete. This year looks no different. I looked at when my spiritual awakening happened, during the month of June around the 20^th June, three years ago, and I looked at what followed, which became clear to me June is the beginning of a yearly spiritual journey for me, which would manifest in dream work, travelling to my soul land (The Highlands, Scotland), confronting some difficulties towards the end of summer and coming out the other end a new person at the beginning of Autumn. So, here I am again feeling a particular way about this forthcoming journey I am about to go on. I am excited, nervous and looking forward to it. It usually begins at this time and continues till the end of summer. Watch the space. I will be posting updates on what comes in and happens in hope someone can relate to this process and get inspired by my journey through the seasons and months of the year.